look im sorry but My Neeps My Tats My Whisky And My

where do all the sleds come from

here hold this it tells you everything thats going on everywhere all at once but without any context

my ideal dog is unimaginably huge, larger than the earth. a lovecraftian titan who wants a scritch that can never be got

when u refer to a letter or its content outside of the context of a letter its considered breaking kayfabe and is frowned upon in the civil war reenactment community

winding it in for everybodys sake

all that stands between me and the void is one to two hours of shit tv a night

i get back from running in the park and i deliver my morning dog report in full and at length

desperately upset that the @secondgentleman handle is taken

i like the nervous host energy of the guy who wipes down the mic and lectern. do you want any more drinks? sorry the house is a real mess i didn't have much warning ahahaha

npm install logs being like wow this blew up here's my soundcloud and onlyfans support open source

cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life; every time you try and change the bin the bag will be a bit small and will rip a bit

well look at you all stressed out and nowhere to go

devastating ourselves with sad books of an evening

running far enough that all the bits of my body fall off until im a head in a bin

the real victim of all of this is jack, who has to see himself in the facetime preview far more than he'd like

watching them play gwent. throwing my beer and popcorn at the tv when the call's bullshit

there must be so much food in the wrong place in this country right now

am i depressed again or did i just forget my afternoon coffee

on strike until the rain stops

you have died. you must complete your tasks.

just realised i dont know what counts as an animal, will report back

we voided some warranties tonight

500mg mashed potato every 5 minutes for 5 days

sometimes i'm struck by a thought and it's so awful and boring it chills me to the bone: what if i put the protein powder in a kilner jar with a little label

the coronavirus is a huge boon for Big QR Code

saying yes to two people on gumtree when there is only one 20l bag of cat litter to pick up, that's how i get my adrenaline. that's how i feel something

turns out the mind body problem was a deal breaker

parental visit: give them a couple of pints and watch them ho hum about how much that house would cost to buy (more than your life)

watching a documentary with my cat about why she's such an arsehole

there is nothing worse you can do to me than to buy me something ugly i have to own

we played firewatch on the weekend and i just want to know why henry is animated like such an oaf. just put it down on the table why are you throwing it across the room

nintendo are the best game company https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2mCqUSDCJE

when i hear you talking in the other room i want to come and listen. i know i've already heard it

i wrote this about the accessibility project at buzzfeed and what it means to me https://tech.buzzfeed.com/accessible-buzzfeed-2e1f3f94f352

the broken tap in my house emitting a loud sine wave day and night is very cool

breaking up with my gym in a beautiful period building because the new one has a heated pool (cowardice)

throwing all the stuff i don't want directly into the garden because i am composting look it up

we've decided the cat's head is too small

running into the cobbler and sweating all over the guy while i get him to cut a key for me quickly and he just doesnt give a shit who im robbing